We had a session on Friday before I left...but we still would be over a week out before another one would be possible.
This past week I have been dealing with a lot of frustrations... traveling with family can be wearisome and I hit my limit sooner than I should have. I took it out on him because I was fed up... To be fair, I only implied that he could be being an idiot. And I did apologize after we both calmed down... I know, it doesn't change anything. Semantics don't override tone.
So I've been dreading this coming Tuesday since that little escapade... I haven't actually had a "punishment" since we restarted, but I'm not excited about it.
But to be honest... in the last 48 hours, I've made a bit of a discovery. And I think that a weekly routine may not be enough for me to start things off. I'm not so sure that my bottom is "smart" enough to remember its lesson over the length of 7 days...
What I've come to realize is that I'm a bit of a temperamental bitch with an attitude problem. I'm not sure how I got so far out of line, but it came to my awareness very recently... and although I can now "see" the problem, it is not as easy to change these habits.
I actually think it would be more beneficial to have a schedule more like this:
Weekdays are the only "plausible" times we can schedule, weekends are too unpredictable...
But let's be fair, I'm only saying this would be "best". Never in a million years would it be possible. But I do wish it was, I think I could use the attention...
Here's to that...
Sounds like you came to a big revelation; which surprises me that it wasn't clear to you before.
ReplyDeleteHmmm, maybe this is hitting me strangely as I did just wake up, but I feel somewhat offended by your comment.
DeleteIn a general sense I can understand the question of "well you're asking for spankings, so you must know something you're doing has been 'out of line'..." But what I'm speaking to specifically is a lack of awareness in my tone of voice & sensitivity to things not-going-my-way (usually interpreted as "no one cares what I want"). And maybe that end is exactly what you're referring to...
But I can't help, in my sleepy haze, to read your comment as "well shoot, I knew you were a bitch... Surprised you just found out." Maybe the fact that referring to myself in this way is not exactly a compliment in my book puts me on edge. Either way, there you go...
Thanks for stopping by,
Autumn
Apologies Autumn, never meant to offend. I don't know you personally or enough about you to make such an assessment.
ReplyDeleteI was referring to your self revelation that you have an attitude problem; an attitude worthily of a spanking. The overall fact that you have ben craving and asking for spankings which must be based on something; something perhaps you have known.
The unfortunate side effect of blog posts and emails is not being able to pickup on someone's tone.
Have a cup of coffee and get back to me ;)
I sent you a message explaining what I meant, but since you haven't posted and or responded to it, I am guessing that I in fact inadvertently did offend you. That was not my intent. My apologies.
ReplyDeleteEnzo, I'm so sorry I left you with the impression that I was upset... I was actually quite fine, upon rereading the comment once fully awake.
DeleteThe thing is, life got crazy... so I disappeared. I promise that I am not upset with you or holding any grudges.
~Autumn
Hi Autumn -
ReplyDeleteGlad that I did not offend. Thank you for clearing that up; however late it was. Wish you would have emailed me offline via my profile email. Ultimately glad all is well and more importantly to see you back! I had wondered about you so often.
Best,
Enzo